59, Female, Single, Melbourne - Eastern Suburbs, VIC
- Last online:
HeadlineGosh, you guys are a tough audience! Thank goodness for Barry White and the joy of mastication.
Yes, I know it gets very hard sometimes to separate MY wheat from THEIR chaff, so here, in glorious black and white, is the All-About-Me List (v2.1) for your convenience. You're welcome!
1. I'm an attractively-packaged chick with curves in all the right places.
2. As a deliberately barren, confirmed spinster - bachelorette is way too groovy for me - I enjoy the splendid view from my cosy shelf.
3. I'm a lacto-ovo vegetarian (get beyond me, vegans!) and shun all flesh, but what you put in your mouth is none of my business.
4. Rather than comparing me to a summer's day, I'd suggest barley sugar - a little brittle and twisted, but delightfully sweet.
5. I'm mighty fond of fruit, and prefer my bananas firm and apricots soft.
6. I like my humour black and non-PC, and revel in puns, parody, satire, sarcasm and downright rudeness. Hey, I might even laugh at you as well as with you!
7. Pepe le Pew, Heathcliff and Barry White were instrumental in shaping my attitudes about lurve and romance. Yes, they set the bar really high, but here's hoping!
8. I heart Big Pants.
9. The nuns taught me to keep my meat covered long before it became mainstream.
10. I suffer from a (self-diagnosed) minor oral fixation, but it's successfully managed with medicinal doses of Haigh's choc-coated licorice, aka bullets.
11. My hallway is in excellent condition, so please don't waste a perfectly good banana.
12. I give good whiff. People often ask me what perfume I'm wearing; it's Mizz Dior tempered with elusive pheromonal pong.
13. Personal attributes include loyalty, thoughtfulness, generosity and blah di blah. I'm also sensual and earthy, but don't fart on the first date.
PS What I wouldn't give for a good woo! Sigh.
At a glance
|Age||59 years old||40 - 65 years old|
|Location||Melbourne - Eastern Suburbs, VIC||Within 25km|
|Relationship status||Single||Single, Widowed, Divorced|
|Smoking habits||Don't smoke||Don't smoke|
|Ethnicity/background||White / Caucasian|
|Sign of the Zodiac||Virgo|
|Personality||Private||Average, Private, Very Private|
|Hair colour||Dark Brown|
|Body type||Average||Athletic, Average, Slim|
|children & pets|
|Have children||No, have no children||Don't live with them, Sometimes living with them, No children, Living with them|
|Wants children||Doesn't want children||Doesn't want children|
|Have pets||No||No, like pets but do not have any, No|
|career & education|
|Education level||Post Graduate||Diploma, Degree, Post Graduate|
|Political persuasion||No strong beliefs|
|Drinking habits||Non-drinker||Non-drinker, Occasionally / socially|
What I'm looking for
Swimwear model with a bulging intellect? A guy with the chiselled good looks of Scott Tracy, albeit a tad taller & less wooden? Smokin' hot St Seb sans arrows? No? Okay,a guy who'll look at me with the same intensity & curiosity used when peering into the contents of his hanky after a fresh blow.
- My heart belongs to those glorious songs of the 70s, but I also have a sneaking admiration for some of the latest crop of crooners. Depending on my mood, there's a time and place for rock, pop, blues, ballads, disco and even a jazz standard or two.
- I'm a voracious reader with a preference for humour, non-fiction, travel memoirs and autobiographies, especially those where our hero triumphs over adversity. I can often be found trawling city bookstores, lurking in the humour aisle and smirking loudly to myself.
- Movies & TV
- Give me an old B&W melodrama any day, especially if someone, somewhere, gets a well-deserved slap. Quirky foreign/art house movies also get a big tick. I'm a devotee of the offerings on the ABC and SBS, but the B&B also remains a long-held, guilty pleasure.
- Extreme man-handling.
- Other Interests
- My nose is usually stuck in a book or glued to a screen, but occasionally I'm in the kitchen baking up a sweet storm. I also enjoy concerts, psychology, cinema, practical philosophy, Scrabble, dining out and collecting fridge magnets (gotta love that Mr Hankey - the resemblance is remarkable!)