59, Female, Single, Melbourne - Eastern Suburbs, VIC
Headline"Physical beauty is transient. Cultivate an appreciation of inner beauty, for it is eternal" - Some ugly wise guy
Yes, I know it gets very hard sometimes to separate MY wheat from THEIR chaff, so here, in glorious black and white, is the All-About-Me List (v2.1) for your convenience. You're welcome!
1. I'm an attractively-packaged chick with curves in all the right places.
2. As a deliberately barren, confirmed spinster - bachelorette is way too groovy for me - I enjoy the splendid view from my cosy shelf.
3. I'm a lacto-ovo vegetarian (get beyond me, vegans!) and shun all flesh, but what you put in your mouth is none of my business.
4. Rather than comparing me to a summer's day, I'd suggest barley sugar - a little brittle and twisted, but delightfully sweet.
5. I'm mighty fond of fruit, and prefer my bananas firm and apricots soft.
6. I like my humour black and non-PC, and revel in puns, parody, satire, sarcasm and downright rudeness. Hey, I might even laugh at you as well as with you!
7. Pepe le Pew, Heathcliff and Barry White were instrumental in shaping my attitudes about lurve and romance. Yes, they set the bar really high, but here's hoping!
8. I heart Big Pants.
9. The nuns taught me to keep my meat covered long before it became mainstream.
10. I suffer from a (self-diagnosed) minor oral fixation, but it's successfully managed with medicinal doses of Haigh's choc-coated licorice, aka bullets.
11. My hallway is in excellent condition, so please don't waste a perfectly good banana.
12. I give good whiff. People often ask me what perfume I'm wearing; it's Mizz Dior tempered with elusive pheromonal pong.
13. Personal attributes include loyalty, thoughtfulness, generosity and blah di blah. I'm also sensual and earthy, but don't fart on the first date.
PS What I wouldn't give for a good woo! Sigh.
PPS May contain traces of nuts.
At a glance
- 59 years old
- Melbourne - Eastern Suburbs, VIC
- 5'2/157 cm
- White / Caucasian
- Star sign - Virgo
- Personality - Private
- Eye colour - Brown
- Hair colour - Dark Brown
- Body Type - Average
- Have no children
- Don't want children
- Have no pets
- Education - Post Graduate
- Other industry
- Other job role
- No strong political beliefs
her ideal partner
- 40 - 60 years old
- Within 25km
- Widowed, Single, Divorced
- Personality - Private, Very Private, Sometimes Social
- Body Type - Athletic, Slim, Average
- Have children at home, Have no children, Sometimes have children at home, Have no children at home
- Don't want children
- Have no pets, Like pets but do not have any
- Education - Diploma, Post Graduate, Degree
- Agnostic, Atheist
- Non-drinker, Occasional/social drinker
What I'm looking for
Swimwear model with a bulging intellect? A guy with the chiselled good looks of Scott Tracy, albeit a tad taller & less wooden? Smokin' hot St Seb sans arrows? No? Okay,a guy who'll look at me with the same intensity & curiosity used when peering into the contents of his hanky after a fresh blow.
- My heart belongs to those glorious songs of the 70s, but I also have a sneaking admiration for some of the latest crop of crooners. Depending on my mood, there's a time and place for rock, pop, blues, ballads, disco and even a jazz standard or two.
- I'm a voracious reader with a preference for humour, non-fiction, travel memoirs and autobiographies, especially those where our hero triumphs over adversity. I can often be found trawling city bookstores, lurking in the humour aisle and smirking loudly to myself.
- Movies & TV
- Give me an old B&W melodrama any day, especially if someone, somewhere, gets a well-deserved slap. Quirky foreign/art house movies also get a big tick. I'm a devotee of the offerings on the ABC and SBS, but the B&B also remains a long-held, guilty pleasure.
- Extreme man-handling.
- Other Interests
- My nose is usually stuck in a book or glued to a screen, but occasionally I'm in the kitchen baking up a sweet storm. I also enjoy concerts, psychology, cinema, practical philosophy, Scrabble, dining out and collecting fridge magnets (gotta love that Mr Hankey - the resemblance is remarkable!)